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What Would Happen if Kevin Smith Became Quentin Tarantino’s Bitch?

I present to you a somewhat fat, slightly balding chain smoking effeminate yet sickeningly breast obsessed film geek named Serendipity Marsupial Tarantino – Buddy for short. Buddy hangs out in the mall all day, drinking five dollar double tall Frappacinos and obsessing over whether Elvis could kick the living shit out of Superman while reading his new shipment of obscure 1950s French comic books.

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News from May 2, 2001

Senate, NBC Make Major Trade

Shockwaves rumbled from the Beltway to Hollywood when the Washington Senators make two historical deals with the National Broadcasting Company, sending George W. Bush and most of his staff to Los Angeles in exchange for the cast of The West Wing. Later, Vice President Dick Cheney was returned to Washington in a separate three way trade between the Senators, NBC and Comedy Central was completed:

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News from April 29, 2001

Joltin Joe Lieberman vs. Jack “Boom Boom” Valenti

The Senator, still pissed off he isn’t the Vice Prez, has unveiled his Senate Bill which would allow the FTC to bring civil charges against media firms that don’t abide by voluntary industry codes prohibiting the marketing of adult materials to children. Should the bill pass a house vote, fines for companies that violate the FTC’s regulations could climb as high as $11,000 per offending incident.

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‘The Wind Done Gone”

Writer Alice Randall has what I think is a great idea… retelling Gone With The Wind from the viewpoint of a slave. However, the estate of Margaret Mitchell disagreed. Despite Randall’s protests that her novel was parody protected by the First Amendment, US District Judge Charles Pannell blocked publication of the novel.

Thankfully, Randall and her publisher, Houghton Mifflin, were granted an expedited appeal of Pannell’s ruling by the 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals. A hearing date has yet to be set. Enterprising readers who received advance copies of the book found the time to head over to EBay, commanding as much as $485 before the site pulled all copies from bidding.

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